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Can you imagine a world without men?  No crime and lots of happy fat women.  ~Nicole Hollander


Women get the last word in every argument.  Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.  ~Author Unknown


Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage.  ~Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly


A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad.  An optimist is a man who hopes they are.  ~Chauncey Mitchell Depew


The rarest thing in the world is a woman who is pleased with photographs of herself.  ~Elizabeth Metcalf


There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women.  ~Madeleine K. Albright


A man's face is his autobiography.  A woman's face is her work of fiction.  ~Oscar Wilde


There's something luxurious about having a girl light your cigarette.  In fact, I got married once on account of that.  ~Harold Robbins


When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment.  When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute.  ~Author Unknown

Women like silent men.  They think they're listening.  ~Marcel Achard, Quote, 4 November 1956


Sure God created man before woman.  But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece.  ~Author Unknown


Some men know that a light touch of the tongue, running from a woman's toes to her ears, lingering in the softest way possible in various places in between, given often enough and sincerely enough, would add immeasurably to world peace.  ~Marianne Williamson, "A Woman's Worth"


Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.  ~Bill Maher


A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car.  ~Carrie Snow


You start out happy that you have no hips or boobs.  All of a sudden you get them, and it feels sloppy.  Then just when you start liking them, they start drooping.  ~Cindy Crawford


Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.  ~Laurence J. Peter


The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.  ~Author Unknown


A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon.  ~Arnold Haultain


Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good.  Luckily, this is not difficult.  ~Charlotte Whitton


Women are always beautiful.  ~Ville Valo


The two women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy.  ~Ellery Queen


Curve:  The loveliest distance between two points.  ~Mae West

Because of our social circumstances, male and female are really two cultures and their life experiences are utterly different.
Kate Millett

Being the boss anywhere is lonely. Being a female boss in a world of mostly men is especially so.
Robert Frost

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.
Desmond Morris

Blue is the male principle, stern and spiritual. Yellow the female principle, gentle, cheerful and sensual. Red is matter, brutal and heavy and always the colour which must be fought and vanquished by the other two.
Franz Marc

Blues music is becoming more and more popular than it ever was. I'm always meeting people on the road that are really young, and are guitar players. male and female.
Mick Taylor

But it's a Broadway show, so even if you're Christine in Phantom, you're still a princess. All female leads are princesses whether they're Disney princesses or not.
Christy Romano

Can you, in a million years, imagine another female senator - Kay Bailey Hutchinson, Claire McCaskill - reacting to being called 'ma'am' like Barbara Boxer did? This is the kind of sanctimonious self-absorption on the modern left that makes my teeth itch.
Mark Davis

Cartooning is a wonderful career, and I'd like more women to get to have it. I can't think of any reason why we won't see more syndicated female cartoonists in the future.
Cathy Guisewite

Cathy was the first widely syndicated humor strip created by a woman. The strip was pretty revolutionary at the time not only because it starred a female, but also because it was so emotionally honest about all the conflicting feelings many women had in 1976.
Cathy Guisewite

Constantly there's a credibility issue; you're judged on how you look. If you look good, people assume you aren't credible. It's a battle you'll always fight if you're on TV and a female.
Lisa Guerrero
If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.  ~Dave Barry


Women like silent men.  They think they're listening.  ~Marcel Achard, Quote, 4 November 1956

To succeed, you need to take that gut feeling in what you believe in and act on it with all of your heart.
Submitted by Kat
If the road to sucess is always under construction, become a construction worker.
Submitted by Nisandeh Neta
Efficiency is doing things right. Effectiveness is doing the right things. Success is doing the right things, right, right now.
Andrew Granatelli
When you are making a success of something, it's not work. It's a way of life. You enjoy yourself because you are making your contribution to the world.
Henry David Thoreau
Men are born to succeed, not to fail.
Vincent Lombardi
The pride of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.
Sam Ewing
Success has a simple formula: do your best, and people may like it.
Danny Thomas
All of us are born for a reason, but all of us don't discover why. Success in life has nothing to do with what you gain in life or accomplish for yourself. It's what you do for others.
Al Bernstein